1.   Assuming he gets on base.

2.   Assuming it gets to you at all, of course.

3.   Assuming they get there, of course.

4.   Assuming he gets it up and over.

5.   Assuming you can get past the damn thing.

6.   At which point Phil Jackson would doubtless strangle him, assuming he could get to him before Michael Jordan or Scottie Pippen.

7.   Now, assuming you have gotten this far, how do you dry your green lumber?