1.   It was as useless as trying to get kidnapped in second grade.

2.   Trying to arrange a temporary nanny proved to be as useless as their hunt for an electrician.

3.   And that half a program is as useless as no program at all.

4.   As useless as my patriotic pride.

5.   As useless as my skill at maneuvering a propeller-driven plane through a perfect Immelmann turn, followed by a flawless slow roll.

6.   But it does appear to be worse than useless as a preventive measure.

7.   Democrats in Congress say that argument may have merit as economic analysis but is useless as a political response to voters and lawmakers demanding a balanced budget.

8.   Even tasks as simple as getting change out of her purse became exercises in frustration, her hands as useless as clubs for maneuvering fine objects.

9.   Holding Byers culpable for everything that stinks in college sport is as useless as blaming McNamara for our post-Vietnam tristesse.