1.   I suppose I could try to weasel out of this by claiming I stole this joke from former Boston Globe columnist Mike Barnicle.

2.   Not that he would ever steal a joke, of course.

3.   So I stole the joke.

4.   Speaking of comedians who steal jokes, vaudeville had Milton Berle, who with Bob Hope is one of its few surviving stars.

5.   Stealing jokes is one thing.

6.   To steal a joke from Tommy Lee Jones, film festivals are everywhere except Dime Box these days.

7.   Playboy founder Hugh Hefner, who often attended celebrity roasts with Berle, said fellow comics would tease their elder colleague for stealing their jokes.